Hi readers! My most recent story is taking a bit more time than usual. So in the meantime, here is a short story from a few months back..
The waves had become like rolling hills in a valley. The crushing wind followed the sun’s descent and the crudeness of earth’s power had begun to reveal itself to the young man. As if a message was sent from the heavens, the once orderly sea had become a raging torment of dark and eternal chaos. Stranded alone in the middle of the Atlantic, the young man stood on the edge of his 30 foot sailboat unrelentingly clinging onto his fishing pole. Sweat dripped from the heavy beard that had become attached to this young man’s body. His tired, dark green eyes maintained the unyielding passion which had led him there in the first place. But upon closer inspection, his eyes conveyed a sadness as black as the ocean around him. He could no longer bear the solitude that seemed to be synonymous with a life on a sailboat.
The waves crashed ferociously onto and over the sides of the boat as if the ocean was attempting to shake this young man awake. As the boat rocked and flowed with the tide of the waves, the young man remained immobile, stoically and vigilantly holding onto his fishing rod. With one pointed, complete concentration, the young man gallantly and naively remained fixated on the pursuit of this giant fish.
Holding firmly onto the rod, he heard a thundering crash envelop the space around him. Rain began to pour down onto the young man’s sailboat as if the atmosphere could even understand the tragic vanity of this young man’s journey. But the young man had no choice other than to continue on; for if he looked clearly, he would recognize that he is but a tiny creature alone in the midst of this chaotic, magnificent ocean with no reason to ever anchor or sail his ship. And so, all that was left for the man to do was continue the seemingly eternal chase of the ephemeral giant fish. The appeal of temporary euphoria promised by her had completely consumed and overwhelmed his life.
A rage had unearthed itself from the depths of his heart. A roaring scream pulsated along with the vibrations which remained as the residue from the thunder. “Come to me!!” The young man screamed with a maniacal insanity. “Come to me!!” The feeling of a total and complete need overwhelmed every rational faculty in his body.
The rain continued to pour down off of the young man’s rain coat into a large puddle beneath his barefoot feet. Laughing and crying, yelling and grumbling, the young man held firmly onto his fishing rod.
And although there was shelter within the boats cabin, he could only perceive the rain, and he would therefore remain lividly attached to edge of the boat. And although the light from the stars began to shine down onto the sea, he could only see the space in-between the stars, and would therefore continue to feel cursed by the torturous darkness. And although there may have been ships not far in the distance passing too and fro, he could only see the fish that seemed to permanently escape him.
And in the midst of all the chaos, a poem had suddenly introduced itself to the young man. And the voice spoke thus:
She came to me in the middle of night, as a burning bright light
And told me
I love you, I love you
But she had to leave
I told you, I told you!
But dost thou see
How far you have gone wrong
Love cannot be caught, bought
or kept, Yes! it is the root of all your wrongs
And the young man had remained firmly planted on the edge of the sailboat listening to the voice which had so quickly overcome him. And the voice continued on:
She came to me in the middle of the night, as a scorching bright light
And told me,
How sweet to the touch
I love you, I love you.
I love you, I love you
But she had to leave
I told you, I told you!
But dost thou see
How far you have gone wrong
We move from port to port
from song to song
It is the movement of things
It is not wrong!
Oh dost thou see
It is only when you see me as me
and let me be me, no matter if you cannot see
That we may tie our ships together
but never, ever forever, for that does not, cannot exist.
And the young man’s knees had begun to shake and he slowly collapsed into the puddle that had accumulated underneath his feet. Tears gushed down the young man’s dark green eyes as he kept holding onto his long brown fishing rod. “But how do I know that you will not leave? forget about me? or fall in love with another?” And after a short silence, The young man’s cried softly into his heart, “If I let go, if I let go, how can I possibly know?”
And the young man continued on,
“Oh, Will you love me as I love you? Think of me as I think of you? Accept me as I accept you? Craziness, insanity, and all?’
And the voice gently whispered back,
Oh dost thou see
It is only when you see me as me
and let me be me, no matter if you cannot see!
For there are no promises! no certainties! no absolutes!
No validation! No verification! No possible alteration!
No conclusion! No solution! No substitution for this truth!
Love is not fair in the way that you hope it to be.
Love is a choice that you must make yourself and yourself alone.
You cannot live on another’s boat no matter how hard you may try,
For we must always return back to our separate sides
But maybe, just maybe, we may one day tie our ships together
But remember that between quiet hours and between long years,
we will never, ever, be forever together, for that can never, ever exist.
And so the young man, full of tenderness and pain, let go of his fishing rod and watched it flail itself off of the boat and down into the depths of the dark stormy sea.
Zach Rausch 